This is my comment posted on Fat Girl Flow blog in response to a post regarding Ashley Nell Tipton’s recent weight loss surgery.
May 20, 2017 at 11:52 am
Sorry if I am going against the grain here. When a fatty (sorry if this term offends anyone) has weight loss surgery we sometimes feel like our favorite cheerleader has quit the squad. We feel dejected and wonder if they were sincere when they were card carrying members of team fatty. Body positivity supports healthy (mental and physical) lifestyles.
Years ago, a friend of mine had weight loss surgery. She was six feet tall, weighed about 430 pounds, with no physical problems or diagnoses. Her husband and children loved her. Did she get remarks about her weight? All the time. Had she dieted (and failed) before the surgery? At least twice a year she was on ‘another’ diet. She volunteered to chaperone a field trip and some of the students were talking about her size. Her son started to cry, and when she called him, he ignored her. He later admitted why he ignored her. He said he was embarrassed. A few months later she decided to have the surgery. I experienced a similar incident with my youngest daughter. I wanted to have the surgery but my doctor said I was a high risk.
Gabourey Sidibe had the surgery when she was diagnosed with Type II diabetes. It’s not that she thought smaller was better, she said healthy is better. I agree.. I’ve been chubby/thick/curvy/fat most of my life. It never bothered me. My thought was ‘as long as I can find nice clothes, get my hair done and put on my make up’ I’m still pretty. I kept eating, refused to exercise my body (even walking). Now I have hypertension, pre-diabetic and use a cane to walk. Still can’t have the surgery, so I told my flesh to quit lying–no we weren’t fine.
I am on a body positivity journey which includes healthier food choices, mild exercise, and dealing with mental health issues. I’ve lost about 20 pounds in the last four months. Do I want to be skinny? No, I just want to add more productive years to my life, enjoy my grandchildren, travel without having to pay for two seats, be able to see my feet, tie my own shoes, fit comfortably in a tub, avoid knee replacements, etc. When I look in the mirror, (most of the time) I like what I see. I don’t feel abandoned or cheated because folks are having weight loss surgery. Would I get discouraged or angry if they had a breast reduction, tummy tuck, face lift, knee replacements? We only get one life–let’s live it to the fullest by respecting others, respecting ourselves, respecting our bodies, and doing what’s best for us.
my journey through eden 
Robbie girl,
I don’t even know what to say (mostly because I blog on the public library’s computers and I have only 15 minutes left, bwahhhh haaa).
Maybe what I should do is reblog this which will jog my memory to respond and give it justice. Then again let me go for it with my 15; i’ll be all over the place with it, but hey this ain’t English class.
“Do I want to be skinny? No, I just want to add more productive years to my life, enjoy my grandchildren, travel without having to pay for two seats, be able to see my feet, tie my own shoes, fit comfortably in a tub, avoid knee replacements, etc. When I look in the mirror, (most of the time) I like what I see. I don’t feel abandoned or cheated because folks are having weight loss surgery. Would I get discouraged or angry if they had a breast reduction, tummy tuck, face lift, knee replacements? ”
My mamma brought me up to love myself. I think I use this to make excuses for not exercising and eating right. As a matter of fact not two hours ago I mentioned to a girlfriend “There is a bunch of stuff which will keep us out of God’s Kingdom. High cholesterol and being fat ain’t two of ’em”. That is true. Even more reasons I don’t overly sweat my health.
Now, like you, I am in pre-diabetes mode, my A1C is (last checked) 6.3. I am grossly overweight. I think they call it “obese” at 5’6″ and 202.5 lbs. I had joined Anytime Fitness last year and was working out regularly. Six months ago we moved here. These black women can COOK do you read me, girl!!!! I have been eating like a big ole hog. Six months ago I was 179 (thought that may sound large) check me out now at over 200! Not cute atall. (Rollling my eyes).
Those who get the surgery . .. . “turned in their fat/curvy/thick cards”. Girl, please. Folk need to quit hatin’. I WISH I could get the surgery. I’m too poor (the pay here is horrendous, the cost of living a tad bit lower for us though). And, I know the best way to to move, move, move. Sewing and sitting don’t help, LOL. Still, I would love gastric bypass (maybe I need to get a “Go Fund Me” account and beg for donations).
” When I look in the mirror, (most of the time) I like what I see.”
My sentiments exactly. Somebody pass the peach cobbler . . . .
Cheers,
Lyric